Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Support System

Many of you know that I have been going through a really rough time lately. I have suffered from depression most of my life. It gets worse after each baby.

After doing some research I believe I have a mild form of bipolar called hypomania. I have had manic episodes after Andrew was born. It was great for a while. I could function on a few hours of sleep, got a lot accomplished and felt like I could conquer the world. Then I began to have anxiety attacks and would black out. Not as much fun.

This time my depression was triggered by another baby, DH in school full time and owning a business. My manic episodes presented as irritability. NOT FUN! I have been short tempered and not a nice person. Everyone around me has suffered.

Thanks to some wonderful friends I attended a post-partum depression class, got an appointment for couples counseling, have an appointment for a medication review and have been able to make a start on discussing my marriage concerns.

So much has changed in the last few years. I am not the same person I was 10 years ago or even 5 years ago. I love my dearest husband with all my heart. I want our marriage to work. I know that we can conquer these changes and learn and grow. I love my kids and look forward to being a happier mom so I can enjoy being around them more. I especially LOVE working. It is so rewarding to work and succeed at something.

I am thankful for all my friends that have been there for me this last week. For a business partner who provides me chocolate and forgives me when I am being an idiot. For employees who see my need for time off and push me out of the store and take over my shift. For customer/friends who take me out to dinner so I can get out. For more employee/friends who jump in to work at the last minute so I can attend meetings. For others who offer me advice and a listening ear. I am grateful for each and every one of you. I would not have made it through this with out you.

5 comments:

Cora Lynn said...

hooray for a healthy helen!

Unknown said...

I had no idea you struggled with such hard things. well, I knew some, but not as much as you revealed in your blog. know we love you and are here for you ANYTIME. I am coming home friday, so I will be able to resume taking Parker and another overnight to give you a break you so deserve. let me know if you need help with babysitting or whatever in the future as well for anything. love you

Unknown said...

Dearest Helen!
I am so very proud of you for allowing us to help you! YOU are an incrediable lady and have inspired me as well. I cherish you as a friend and I am very reliefed that you have found some much needed help.
I am especially proud of you on attending meetings...that's the first step. Everything else will soon fall in place.
Jim and I had a fabulous time with you the other night. We both learned alot about you in that evening. It was fun and spontanous and that is what it makes it so special.
Jim sends his warm wishes and I will see you very soon! Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers dear friend! We will always be your support! Hang in there and keep your heart open.
Love ya!
Robyn

scrapmomof5 said...

thanks everyone. I have more appointments tomorrow. Plus Sarah and I are taking a trip in June! Yeah for fun, friends and Prozac!!!

sarah said...

YOu are very brave---In doing this for yourself- You also will help someone else...everything is full circle!
Hugs!
SArah